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写作
【写作指导】申请信一般包括以下内容:
1. 介绍信息来源(有时可省略);
2. 表明申请心意,即写信的目的;
3. 介绍个人简历并表明自己的优势;
4. 表达愿望并请求答复。
【真题再现】假定你是李华,在校报英语专栏看到了学校“英语文化节”的一则招募启事。请阅读启事,并根据写作要点和写作要求写一封应征邮件。
Volunteers Wanted
Our annual English Festival, which will be held on June 15-17, 2015, is now looking for 20 student volunteers to provide service for Talent Show, Speech Contest, and English Debate. If you are interested, please send an application email at your earliest convenience to Ms Chen at chenlaoshi@aef.com.
写作要点:1. 表达写信意图;2. 陈述应征目的;3. 说明应征条件(性格、能力等)。
写作要求:1. 邮件词数不少于100;2. 开头和结尾部分已写好,不计入总词数;3. 可根据情况增加细节,使行文连贯;4. 不能使用真实姓名和学校名称。
Dear Ms Chen,
I'm Li Hua, a student from Class 2, Grade 3. ______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
Looking forward to your reply.
Yours truly,
Li Hua
(2015年陕西卷书面表达)
【审题定调】本写作任务要求根据给出的招募启事写一封申请信,并给出了三条写作要点。人称以第一人称为主,时态主要用现在时。
【参考范文】Dear Ms Chen,
I'm Li Hua, a student from Class 2, Grade 3. I'm writing to apply for the position as a student volunteer.
I really want to obtain this precious opportunity because, by offering my service, I will be able to improve my organisational ability, communication skills as well as my confidence in speaking English in public.
As an outgoing girl, I get along well with my classmates. Besides, I have such a good command of English that I have been elected as assistant to my English teacher. I have helped her successfully in several of my class's English activities, which has been appreciated by both teachers and classmates.
I am sure that I can live up to your expectations perfectly. I would be grateful if you could give me your kind consideration.
Looking forward to your reply.
Yours truly,
Li Hua
【范文点评】本文完全完成了试题规定的任务。第一段表达写作意图,第二段陈述应征目的,第三段说明应征条件,覆盖了所有内容要点。最后一段还礼貌地表达了自己的愿望。文中用到的高级词汇有obtain, precious, organisational, as well as, outgoing, have a good command of, appreciate, perfectly, live up to one's expectations等;用到的复杂语法结构有非谓语动词短语、such ... that引导的结果状语从句、非限制性定语从句、宾语从句、条件状语从句等。
【学生习作】Dear Ms Chen,
I'm Li Hua, a student from Class 2, Grade 3. I'm writing to apply for the position as a student volunteer.
There are many reasons why I put in for the position. To begin with, I can enable myself to gain some valuable life experience as well as work skills. Secondly, I think making friends with people as a volunteer would be a wonderful thing. Besides, volunteering would provide me with a good opportunity to contribute to our school and break down barriers of understanding so that I can build self-confidence through it.
I think I'm qualified for the position. I'm kind by nature, easy-going and always ready to help others. I have a good character, being confident and independent in life. What's more, English is my favorite subject and I've won several prizes in English contests, which will help me make your good choice.
I'd appreciate it if you could give me the opportunity to prove myself.
Looking forward to your reply.
Yours truly,
Li Hua
【点评】该习作完成了试题规定的任务:覆盖了所有内容要点,应用了较多的复杂语法结构(定语从句、宾语从句、状语从句、非谓语动词等)和高级词汇(put in for, enable, contribute to, barrier, by nature, appreciate等),有效地使用了语句间的连接成分(to begin with, secondly, besides, what's more等)。存在的问题主要有:一、部分表达不够精炼(如I can enable myself to)或语义重复(如第三段第二和第三句);二、部分内容缺乏逻辑性(如第二段末句中的break down barriers of understanding so that I can build self-confidence through it);三、部分内容表义不清(如which will help me make your good choice)。
此外,虽然本题写作要求中有关词数的部分只有下限没有上限,但也不宜写太多内容(本文148词)。否则一方面会占用过多的考试时间,另一方面也会增加出错的机率。
【改后稿】Dear Ms Chen,
I'm Li Hua, a student from Class 2, Grade 3. I'm writing to apply for the position as a student volunteer.
There are many reasons why I put in for the position. To begin with, I can gain some valuable life experience as well as work skills. Secondly, I think making friends with people as a volunteer would be a wonderful thing. Besides, volunteering would provide me with a good opportunity to contribute to our school and build self-confidence.
I think I'm qualified for the position. I'm kind by nature, easy-going and always ready to help others. What's more, English is my favorite subject and I've won several prizes in English contests, which will help me offer a better service.
I'd appreciate it if you could give me the opportunity to prove myself.
Looking forward to your reply.
Yours truly,
Li Hua
【实战演练】下面是另一位同学的习作,请根据点评中指出的问题对它进行修改。
Dear Ms Chen,
I'm Li Hua, a student from Class 2, Grade 3. I've read your announcement in the school newspaper. I really want to participate this activity. I'd like to become a volunteer for the English Festival. With this opportunity, I can work out myself and improve my communication skills.
Now, I want to tell you something about myself. I'm a responsible student and always obey my words. Being a active young person, I get on well with my classmates. All of them think I'd be able to do this work well. I'm also good at English, especially spoken English.
I'll try my best to do this work well. Please give this chance to experience.
Looking forward to your reply.
Yours truly,
Li Hua
【点评】该习作基本完成了试题规定的任务。存在的问题有:一、没有安排好内容的主次,比如写信目的着墨过多而应征目的则一笔带过;二、语法结构单调,高级词汇有限;三、文中有一些词汇和语法方面的错误,如participate this activity, work out myself, obey my words, a active young person, give this chance to experience。
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
【答案】Dear Ms Chen,
I'm Li Hua, a student from Class 2, Grade 3. I've read your announcement in the school newspaper. I'd like to become a volunteer for the English Festival.
With this opportunity, I can improve my communication skills, increase my confidence and make more friends.
Now, I want to tell you something about myself. I'm a responsible student and always keep my word. Being an active young person, I get on well with my classmates, all of whom think I'd be able to do this work well. Moreover, I'm fluent in English, especially spoken English.
Given the chance, I will spare no efforts to complete my task perfectly. Please give me your kind consideration.
Looking forward to your reply.
Yours truly,
Li Hua
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