文/刘宝彩
让学生又好又快写出中高考英语作文,为学生及其家长所关注的:先看步骤咋操作;后看成文咋组合。对此有的学生甚至家长不免想到也是众所周知的:英语书面表达或英语作文各类考试,不知道从哪个角度考虑去写。按英语作文提示句要求,多数同学也只是直接把所给提示“楞译”成英语(中式英语),给“堆”那了事。因为有的学生在考场上时间紧,导致随便找几个“中文词儿译英”就OK了,但他们的读者却不知英文表达的是啥意。为此要彻底改变,让考试学生宝贝们写英语有逻辑层次感,来看看英语写作每一步独特骤操作及怎么组合成文。
以如下已知作文条件为例:
请你以中学生的名义,写一封信呼吁世界各地的中学生们拯救大熊猫(giant panda)信的内容如下:
1.大熊猫是中国的稀有(rare)动物,也是世界稀有的动物之一,为中国人民和世界人民所喜爱。
2. 大熊猫生长在山里,以竹子为食,由于山林遭到破坏,竹子被砍伐,大熊猫觅食越来越困难,正濒临灭绝。
3. 我国要建立数个自然保护区(natural reserve),以保护大熊猫,但需要更多的资金。
4. 我们希望大家伸出援助之手,来保护大熊猫。
一、步骤操作:借助“左找原因 提示句 右找结果”公式,作提示句的填充题
把“请你以中学生的名义,写一封信呼吁世界各地的中学生拯救大熊猫(giant panda)信”当作英语作文的重要提示句,按照公式写出来。
左找原因:我请大家帮助拯救大熊猫(I ask you for a help in saving giant pandas.)
提 示 句:我作为一名中学生给大家写一封信(I, one of Chinese students, would write a letter to you high-school students from parts of the world .)
右找结果:让大熊猫快乐和健康生活(This makes them live happily and healthily.)
注意:原始提示句并没有写“右找结果”句,而需要学生动脑筋找到写出来。
二、组合成文:提示句要使用英语五个句型之一(这里用主谓宾);“左找原因”句用非谓语之一(这里用doing现在分词形式);“右找结果”句为介词短语(这用in doing形式)。所以用公式填充的整个提示句内容是:
I, one of Chinese students, would write a letter to you high-school students from parts of the world, asking you for a help in saving giant pandas in making them live happily and healthily. (我作为一名中学生给大家写一封信,是因为请大家帮助拯救大熊猫,以让其快乐、健康生活。)
三、写具体四个提示句
(一)具体提示句1.大熊猫是中国的稀有(rare)动物,也是世界稀有的动物之一,为中国人民和世界人民所喜爱。
左找原因:大熊猫是中国的稀有(rare)动物,也是世界稀有的动物之一,令人感兴趣(As pandas are rare enough to be interesting to Chinese and foreign people...)
提 示 句:中国人民和世界人民所喜爱这种动物(Chinese and foreign people are full of love for the animals.)
右找结果:他们受到人们非常的欢迎(They become really popular with people.)
注意:原始提示句并没有写“右找结果”句,而需要学生动脑筋找到写出来。句式使用小结
“左找原因”句使用从句之一,主系表句型,这里用“As 主系表(As pandas are rare enough to be interesting to...);
提示句要使用英语五个句型之一,这里用主系表句型(Chinese and foreign people are full of...);
“右找结果”句需要加上“结果标志词”This shows that...,其后加“主系表”结构句作为结果句(这里用 pandas become popular...)。所以用公式填充的整个提示句1内容组合成文:
As pandas are rare enough to be interesting to Chinese and foreign people, they are full of love for the animals. This shows they become really popular with people.(大熊猫是稀有(rare)动物,令中外人们感兴趣,这样它们得到喜爱,由此受到欢迎。)
(二)提示句2.大熊猫生长在山里,以竹子为食,由于山林遭到破坏,竹子被砍伐,大熊猫觅食越来越困难,正濒临灭绝
左找原因:由于一些人砍伐大熊猫以山林为生存的竹子(Some people cut down bamboos in forest here. By these, pandas come to live.)
提 示 句:大家发现大熊猫觅食竹子越来越困难(You found it increasingly difficult for pandas to get bamboos eaten enough in the forest.)
右找结果:处于濒危之中/正濒临灭绝(This is dangerous for the pandas.)
注意:“左找原因”原因句需要学生找到“谁砍伐...”写出来,即,“一些人砍伐(Some people cut...)”加上。
组合成文的句式使用小结
“左找原因”句使用英语五个句型之一,这里用主谓宾句型(Some people cut down bamboos...);提示句用五个句型之一,主谓宾宾句型(people found it for pandas to do...)及用主谓宾补(...get bamboos eaten...);“右找结果”句使用英语五个句型之一,主系表句型(This is dangerous for ...)
所以用公式填充的整个提示句2内容是:
Some people cut down bamboos in forest here. By these, pandas come to live. You found it increasingly difficult for pandas to get bamboos eaten enough in the forest. This is dangerous for the pandas.(由于一些人砍伐大熊猫以山林为生存的竹子,所以大家发现大熊猫觅食竹子越来越困难,这样正处于濒临灭绝中。)
(三)提示句3.我国要建立数个自然保护区(natural reserve),以保护大熊猫,但需要更多的资金。
左找原因:由于要保护大熊猫免遭伤害(To protecting pandas from being done harm),其中protecting的ing形式表示“由于”
提 示 句:所以中国要建立数个自然保护区(China would have a few natural reserves set up within special area.)
右找结果:如此需要更多的资金(As you know from this, much money needs to be put in building them.)
注意:“左找原因”句“保护大熊猫”之后加上“免遭伤害”更加完整。
组合成文句式使用小结
“左找原因”句使用英语五个句型之一,这里用“主谓宾 介词短语”句型(To protecting pandas from being done harm...)
提示句用五个句型之一,主谓宾补句型(...have a few natural reserves set up...)
“右找结果”句使用英语五个句型之一,主谓宾句型(...money needs to be put ...)
所以用公式填充的整个提示句2内容是:
To protect pandas from being done harm, China would have a few natural reserves set up within special area. As you know from this, much money needs to be put in building them.(为了保护大熊猫免遭伤害,中国要建立数个自然保护区,因此需要更多的资金。)
(四)提示句4.我们希望大家伸出援助之手,来保护大熊猫。
左找原因:摆脱大熊猫可能的死亡(Getting pandas out of death perhaps,)
提 示 句:我们希望大家伸出援助之手(You world-wide students are asked to give the protection area money in your wishes, I as one of Chinese students sincerely hope.)
右找结果:如I thank you so much for your kind help to China in saving pandas.
注意:⑴“左找原因”句,需要学生动脑筋找出来,加上:“为了摆脱大熊猫可能的死亡”;⑵提示句中,学生要加上“感谢伸援手”之意(原提示句没有此原因句意);⑶“右找结果”句,把“保护熊猫”改为“拯救熊猫(in saving pandas)”,因保护字样前述已有。
组合成文句式使用小结
“左找原因”句使用英语五个句型之一,这里用“主谓宾 介词短语”句型(Getting pandas out of death perhaps, ...)其中ing表示“由于...”之意。
提示句用五个句型之一,主谓宾(to do...)句型(You world-wide students are asked to give...)
“右找结果”句使用英语五个句型之一,这里用“主谓宾 介词短语”句型(I thank you so much for your kind help...)
所以用公式填充的整个提示句2内容是:
Getting pandas out of death perhaps, you world-wide students are asked to give the protection area money in your wishes, I as one of Chinese students sincerely hope. For this, I thank you so much in saving pandas.(为了摆脱大熊猫可能的死亡,请大家作为全球学生自愿保护区捐钱,我作为一名中国学生衷心希望如此。)
四、整篇英文作文及其中译文汇总下:
I, one of Chinese students, would write a letter to you high-school students from parts of the world, asking you for a help in saving giant pandas in making them live happily and healthily.
As pandas are rare enough to be interesting to Chinese and foreign people, they are full of love for the animals. This shows they become really popular with people.
Some people cut down bamboos in forest here. By these, pandas come to live. You found it increasingly difficult for pandas to get bamboos eaten enough in the forest. This is dangerous for the pandas.
To protect pandas from being done harm, China would have a few natural reserves set up within special area. As you know from this, much money needs to be put in building them.
Getting pandas out of death perhaps, you world-wide students are asked to give the protection area money in your wishes, I as one of Chinese students sincerely hope. For this, I thank you so much in saving pandas.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours Sincerely,
Li Jin, a student in a high school, China.
中译文:
我作为一名中学生给大家写一封信,是因为请大家帮助拯救大熊猫,以让其快乐、健康生活。大熊猫是稀有动物,令中外人们感兴趣,这样它们得到喜爱,由此受到欢迎。由于一些人砍伐大熊猫以山林为生存的竹子,所以大家发现大熊猫觅食竹子越来越困难,这样正处于濒临灭绝中。为了保护大熊猫免遭伤害,中国要建立数个自然保护区,因此需要更多的资金。为了摆脱大熊猫可能的死亡,请大家作为全球学生自愿为保护区捐钱,我作为一名中国学生衷心希望如此。
期待收到你们的回复。
敬上,
李津
中国一名中学生
作者最后赠送英语写作学习者的话:
汗水浇灌着长久而坚实的梦想;努力铸就着历史和现实的希望!